Despite many things having remained the same, my life looks somehow different to me now. There is a light, a gentle laughter and a knowledge underneath it all. This is serious business I am undertaking and yet I’m not taking myself seriously. I am committed to seeing the healing through.
There’s a sense that I’ve had it all wrong for most of my life, but also a sense of that being ok. I welcome learning. I welcome a teacher of infinite patience and compassion. I welcome miracles.
And as much as I’d love to make myself special and get out there and change the world, I cannot help but feel that isn’t what will change it. I sense that a change in the world will come from a shift in how I see the world. I need not shake my fist and stomp the floor, although at times that may be what is called for.
I’m beginning to see that I am being guided at any given moment. This is my church and my altar. As I am willing to give my life over to a loving power greater than myself, I will be shown where to go and what to say. No need to push, no need to shove. The urge to call my brother, that spark to write a book: this is how I move. I allow it. I give it legs.
And clarity…clarity will come. I am after all, still drowsy.